What to do When Your Husband is Always Irritated with You

husband is irritated with you

It seems like you can’t do anything right.

Your husband is becoming increasingly annoyed and irritated with you over insignificant or minor things such as misplacing a sock from the dryer, or turning the lamp on to read.

The result is:

You feel like you are walking on egg shells when you’re around him, and finally you want to avoid seeing him all together.

It’s really straining your marriage.

But don’t lose hope yet.

There’s a simple solution to this problem, and it requires little to no action on your part.

No “working on the marriage”, no “let’s talk about our relationship”.

Want to know what to do?

Read on.

First:

2 Things You Desperately Want to Know

Here’s what you probably want to know:

1.       Why is your husband always irritated with you (is it your fault)?

2.       How can you make it stop (and get your loving husband back)?

I’d like to suggest my point of view and answer these questions for you:

1. Why Your Husband is Constantly Irritable

The most important thing I want you to understand that even though his irritation and dissatisfaction is directed at you – it has nothing to do with you.

NOTHING.

Your husband is really annoyed with himself. HE is the one he is irritated at.

[yellowbox]This is his way to express HIS profound personal unhappiness.[/yellowbox]

Since most of us are used to looking outside for someone else to blame when we  feel like crap, your husband has found the easiest (and nearest) person to blame.

It’s you, of course.

husband is irritated and angry

[yellowbox]To explain his misery, he is fixating on your every action and word and using it as an excuse for why he doesn’t like his life (and himself!) at this point.[/yellowbox]

But WHY is he depressed or Unsatisfied with his life?

There are literally hundreds of possible reasons for his personal unhappiness.

Maybe he grew up with critical and judgmental parents who made him feel nothing he does is good enough (sounds familiar?).

Maybe this led him to have unrealistic expectation from himself, his marriage and everyone around him.

Maybe he is frustrated from wanting many things while believing he can never get them.

The point is, it DOESN’T matter.

No matter how much you love him and want to support him, there is nothing you can do about it.

(Well, almost nothing, as you’ll see below)

HE is the only one that creates his own reality.

Here’s what I guarantee:

[yellowbox]When he feels better about himself, his whole attitude towards you will change.[/yellowbox]

His irritability will be gone. His anger will subside. He will be able to see you – his wonderful wife and best friend – who he cannot see right now.

This leads us to the second question:

2. How to Make it Stop and Get Your Loving Husband Back?

Look:

There is only one thing you can do to get your loving husband back, and it requires no action on your part.

[yellowbox]It only requires you to change the way you THINK.[/yellowbox]

It’s a law of nature:

The things you focus on – get bigger.

If you focus on his irritability and anger – I assure you it’ll get bigger.

On the other hand, if you focus, with all your might – on his positive attributes – you’ll witness more and more of them re-appearing – every day.

Here’s what to do:

  1. Sit down for 3 minutes every day and write a list of things about him – that you are thankful for.

The children he has brought to this world with you.

The way he can make you laugh. His heart-warming smile.

The family that you’ve created together.

The way he supports your family financially.

If you put your heart to it, you’ll find dozens of things.

2. Think back and remember all the fun times and the little amazing moments you had together. Remember the way he was there for you over the years.

This is the REAL man you are married to. He is there, hiding somewhere underneath his depression and anger.

This man still loves you with all his heart.

Stick with these thoughts for at least 10 minutes every day.

And when you’re done, let it go.

And When He Gets Irritated With You Again?

When he gets irritated again, just ignore it. Think of it as an illusion. A dream. A TV show that isn’t real.

Accept it, but don’t take it to heart. It has nothing to do with you.

The only reality you accept from now on is the one on your list.

If you stick with it for 30 days, I promise you’ll see the real, physical reality change in front of your eyes.

You’ll find yourself capable of seeing the real things that bother him.

You’ll be able to encourage him to follow his dreams, to do whatever he needs to be happy again. To love himself again (or maybe for the first time in his life).

You’ll be able to tell him that you believe he is a powerful man, capable of achieving anything he wants, and that he has no limitations.

And while you’re at it, tell yourself the exact same things.

And see him fall in love with you all over again.

And feel you fall in love with him all over again.

See your marriage renewed. See your children calmer. Happier.

Close your eyes.

Can you see it? Can you feel it?

Then it’s there.

I promise.

Rooting for ya,

Lisa

P.S

And while you’re at it, here’s the simplest way to bring the spark back to your marriage.

I’m sharing everything on my journey to affair recovery and a loving, stable marriage. Will you join me?

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PAID ENDORSEMENT DISCLOSURE: In order for me to support my blogging activities, I may receive monetary compensation or other types of remuneration for my endorsement, recommendation, testimonial and/or link to any products or services from this blog.

The Best Way to Change Your Husband’s Mind about Divorce

What can you do when your husband wants a divorce and you don’t?

How can you save your marriage when he wants to leave you?
change husband mind about divorce

 

How can you change his mind when he claims he has “fallen out of love?” (There’s no pill for that, unfortunately)

It seems hopeless. I know.

When a wife learns that her husband “loves her but not in love” with her, she goes crazy trying to find a fix.

She talks to her best friend. She goes online and search for “the” answer.

The one, quick answer to help you stop your divorce and reconcile your marriage.

The problem is:

Finding a solution to your marriage problems, and changing his mind about separating is not is not like finding a recipe for mushroom soup.

You can’t just click and get instant gratification.

However:

If you’re willing to do some work, and be patient, chances are you’ll reap the rewards and save your marriage.

What I’m about to share is not a short cut.

It takes time.

But I believe it’s the best way to change your husband’s mind about divorce.

More importantly:

It will help him realize he’s about to make a huge mistake. One that he may regret for the rest of his life.

Ready?

Let’s go:

The Ultimate Way to Change Your Husband’s Mind about Divorce

There are plenty of “fast” ways to make your husband stay and give your marriage one more try.

I’m sure you’ve thought (or even tried) some of them:

1.       Begging, pleading, and threatening.

2.       Telling him you love him over and over again

3.       Giving him reassurance (“I’ve changed, I won’t do this and that anymore)

4.       Making him jealous

While these methods can work, none of them last. Not in the long-term.

Your husband wants to leave because he is not happy with your relationship.

If he plans to leave for another woman, it’s still because he is not happy with your marriage.

If your relationship doesn’t change, he will leave.

Maybe not today, but in a week. Or a month.

Relationships, like crops, are governed by the natural laws of the universe. If you skip a step, you’ll short-circuit the process and slow yourself down. But if you take your time and go step-by-step…that’s the fastest way.

–       Mort Fertel (Marriage Fitness Program)

prevent a divorce

The best way (and the only way) to stop a divorce is to change yourself.

You can’t change him. You can’t change anyone else.

You can only change yourself.

Frustrating, but true.

There is an energy that emanates from all of us. You can’t fake it. It’s a matter of who you are.

And who you are is determined by how you live. And more importantly – how (and what) you think.

The only way to save your marriage from divorce is to change yourself.

Take responsibility on your part alone.

BE the person that you would want to be married to.

For example:

You want him to care more? To love you more?

YOU should care more about him. Love him more.

You want him to appreciate you and help you?

YOU appreciate him more. Help him more.

Ignore the circumstances. Ignore the tension and uncertainty that’s going on right now.

Be who you want to be married to – consistently.

What About Him? Doesn’t HE Have to Change?

prevent divorce

You may be thinking “It’s not me that needs to change. It’s HIM!”

“HE is the one that has emotionally checked out of your marriage.”

You’re probably right about what your husband needs to change.

But being right won’t get you where you want to go.

I’ve learned this golden advice from Mort Fertel:

It’s a complete waste of time and energy to focus on your spouse’s problems and faults.

There’s absolutely nothing you can do about them.

I know it’s annoying to admit this, but you had a role in the deterioration of your marriage.

There is no troubled marriage caused by one spouse alone.

Think about your past relationships. Do you see a pattern?

What about your parents’ marriage? Are you recreating what you’ve seen as a child?

You may get angry with me now, but even if your spouse had an affair, you’re somewhat responsible.

It’s NOT your fault and this doesn’t excuse his behavior, but the questions still remains:

What was your husband seeking outside the marriage that was not available in it?

The Best Way to Use Your Chance for a Second Chance

Look:

You only get one chance for a second chance.

Don’t blow your chance on obsessing about how HE should change.

Don’t waste this opportunity on a quick-fix that won’t work in long-term.

Begin, now, the real process of stopping your divorce and renewing your marriage.

Learn how to build the new building blocks for a happier, lasting marriage.

Do husbands change their minds about leaving?

Yes. They do.

But only if you know the right steps to take – starting today.

This free guide is the place to start.

In it you’ll find:

  • How to rebuild broken trust
    How to deal with “I’m not in love with you.”
    How to reconnect
    How to get over the past
    How to stop a divorce
    How to avoid a separation
    How to forgive and be forgiven
    Plus 5 free Marriage Assessments

Start today. Now. Before it’s too late.

Rooting for ya,

Lisa

 

PAID ENDORSEMENT DISCLOSURE: In order for me to support my blogging activities, I may receive monetary compensation or other types of remuneration for my endorsement, recommendation, testimonial and/or link to any products or services from this blog.

31 Quick & Easy Tips to Instantly Improve Your Marriage

improve your marriage

Do you believe that you have to work hard to improve your marriage?

Did someone convince you that all marriage challenges require hours of counseling and endless talks about your relationship?

Well, that’s not necessarily true.

Working on your marriage doesn’t have to be work at all.

It can be easy, and fun.

Tiny acts of kindness can lead to a huge positive change in your marriage.

In fact, many experts claim that you should stop solving your marriage problems all together (Here’s why).

However:

All relationships need a little pick-me-up sometimes, even the best ones.

All you have to do is to start doing two or three of these quick and easy tips, and you’ll instantly change the dynamics in your marriage.

The tips you’ll find here are:

  1.  Not expensive
  2. Won’t take more than 5 minutes

Here we go:

31 Easy Ways to Improve Your Marriage by the End of the Day

1.   Text your love and appreciation – every man likes to be reminded that he is loved and appreciated.

When he is not at home or around you – sending a short love text message can be the perfect pick me up, a thoughtful surprise and it will keep you on his mind all day.

For example:

  • “I’m so lucky you’re my best friend”
  • “I still fall for you every day”
  • “Have I mentioned today how lucky I am to be in love with you?”
  • You are hilarious, still laughing about…
  • This has been a challenging time, and I appreciate you so much.”

Want more? See 101 short love text messages HERE.

2.   When you are together, turn off both your phones and talk to each other while keeping eye contact all the time.

3.   Pull your car over and make out more often.

4.   Take 2 minutes to think about all of his positive traits. Tell him why you love him.

5.   Go on a short (or long) walk and hold hands.

6.   Spice up your marriage through texting – You can bring the romance and passion back to your marriage – simply by pushing a few buttons on your cell phone.

texting to improve marriage

For example:

You: “When I see you tonight I’m going to…”

Him: “What?”

You: “Oh, you’ll find out… “

Here are 3 powerful ways to use texting to spice up your marriage (with examples)

7.   Take 5 minutes to plan your next date night. Make date nights a priority. Time together alone is vital for your relationship.

Here are 31 fabulous date night ideas to get your started.

8.   Give him an honest compliment.

9.   Always try to answer the phone when he calls.

10.   Praise him in front of the kids. (Here are 10 things every man wants to hear from his wife

11.   When he gets home – greet him at the door, drop everything you’re doing and kiss him.

12.   Brag about him to your family or friends and make sure he can hear it.

13.   Bring him a drink or a snack when he works at his desk.

14.    Keep your flirt on – flirting cannot be saved for anniversaries. It’s an easy way to keep the spark in your marriage and the romance alive.

For example:

  • Smack his butt – when he’s walking by.
  • A flirt note – write a flirty note (like “I’m available and I think you’re cute!”) and have one of your kids give it to him while you’re spending time as a family together.

Here are 18 cute and easy ways to flirt with your husband.

15.  Wear something you know he loves.

16.   Ask his advice on something and then follow it.

17.   Remind him of a funny moment from your past. Laughter reminiscence packs an additional punch because you relive the moment by laughing again.

strengthen your marriage

18.   Notice his effort about something and acknowledge it. Sincerely thank him for it.

For example:

  • “Thank you for fixing…even though it’s so hot outside”
  • “Thank you for playing with the kids, even though you’re tired from work”.

19.   Go to bed together.

20.   Turn on some catchy music while you’re cooking and start dancing together.

21.   Have sex in a different place. Try having sex in a room or area you’ve never done it in.

22.   Start a pillow fight.

23.   Read a chapter from a marriage/relationship book together, and talk about it. It’s a cheap and easy way to start intimate conversations.

(We just picked up “101 Conversation starters for couples” by Dr. Gary Chapman, we love it)

24.   Nurture your spiritual connection by starting the day with a prayer together.

25.   Take 5 minutes to solve your financial issues. One baby step at a time.

26.   Next time you’re in bed pull the covers over your head and have a whispered conversation

27.   Think of one weird or quirky thing he does that you love and tell him about it.

28.   Next time you’re at the corner store, pick up his favorite candy or gum.

29.   Invite his best friend to dinner.

30.   Next time you wake up before him, turn off the alarm clock and wake him by yourself – by kissing his forehead.

31.   Give him a surprise quick shoulder massage.

Conclusion

Improving your marriage does not have to involve hard work, couples therapy and endless talks about “us”.

The butterfly effect, when small causes can have large effects – can work in any marriage – including yours.

Just try a few of these quick ways to strengthen your bond, reignite the spark and revive the romance every other day – and you’ll be amazed by the results.

I’m sure I’ve left out a few more great ideas, I’d love for you to contribute and let us know about more tips I haven’t thought about, in the comments below.

Rooting for ya,

Lisa

I’m sharing everything on my journey to affair recovery and a loving, stable marriage. Will you join me?

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PAID ENDORSEMENT DISCLOSURE: In order for me to support my blogging activities, I may receive monetary compensation or other types of remuneration for my endorsement, recommendation, testimonial and/or link to any products or services from this blog.

18 Cute (& Naughty) Ways to Flirt with Your Husband

[yellowbox]Flirting used to be so easy back in the days…right?[/yellowbox]

You didn’t have to read articles about it. It happened naturally when you were dating.

flirt with your husband

But when you’re married for a long time, not so much.

Before we know it, the romance, passion and excitement go out the window and flirting is reserved for anniversaries, if at all.

But flirting is critical in a marriage, and an easy way to keep the spark and the romance alive, no matter how busy and exhausting your life may be.

A few (or just one) small gestures throughout the day can be gentle reminders of the passionate side in your relationship, and it doesn’t have to be hard work.

Here are 18 cute, naughty and romantic ways to flirt with your husband, in any situation:

18 Easy Ways to Flirt with Your Husband 

1. Smack his butt – when he’s walking by, smack his butt and move on. Turn around to see his surprised face, and wink at him playfully.

2. Secret code phrase – a great idea from Sheila Wray Gregoire (To Love Honor and Vacuum):

Want to tell him you think he’s hot? Try a secret code phrase, like “Are we due for an oil change?” No one else will know what you really mean but him, so you can say it in front of the kids, in front of your parents, in front of anybody!

3. Hide and seek – buy a small gift or just write a little love note and hide it in your bra. When he comes home from work tell him that you have a surprise for him somewhere on your body. But be prepared to deliver later… 🙂

4. A flirt note – write a flirty note (like “I’m available and I think you’re cute!”) and have one of your kids give it to him while you’re spending time as a family together.

flirt with husband note

5. “Forget” your panties – for one evening, go commando. Wear a short skirt and while doing house chores, bend over and see if he notices.

6. The unexpected compliment – compliment him on something unexpected and boost his ego for the rest of the day. Tell him how you feel when he holds your hands, or kisses your cheek.

By the way, the more you compliment him on certain behaviors, the more he’ll repeat them.

7. Touch him – so obvious, yet so effective. Hop on his lap when you’re watching TV. Stroke him thighs under the table during dinner. Seize any opportunity to be physically close.

8. Text him – this is definitely my favorite way to get the flirt on with my husband. Texting is an easy way to get his attention (and keep it!) throughout the day, no matter where he or you are doing.

Source: Curiano.com

Source: Curiano.com

It appears, shockingly, that you can use texting for more than reminders for kids’ schedules and your fridge’s missing inventory.

Here are a few flirty texts you can use, guaranteed to heat things up in seconds and making him think about you all day:

·         Let’s have a naked dinner #nakeddinners

·         No kids! No panties! No rules!

·         If you were here right now…

[yellowbox]I have more great flirty texts in this post (and how, when and where to use them)[/yellowbox]

Alternatively, you can use texting in romantic or cute ways.

Text him romantic song lyrics, a memory of fun times (last night? J) or a great love quote/compliment. If you’re short in ideas, I have you covered. Here’s my post with 101 romantic text messages for him.

9. Note on the car mirror – sneak out and leave a flirty note on his car rear view mirror saying “I’m jealous of this mirror because it’s looking at you.”

10. Dance in the kitchen – turn on your favorite song in your phone or tablet and dance in the kitchen when he least expects it.

11. Sexy picture – take a sexy (yet subtle) picture of yourself and send it to your husband. You can send it to him even if he’s sitting next to and watching TV for an extra laugh.

Warning: No naked or semi naked pictures. That can go wrong in so many ways. 🙂

12. A pillow fight – a pillow fight is not reserved for children. And it’s a great way to make a move on your husband. Just toss him a few pillows and start swinging. A great fun-before-bed activity.

via GIPHY

13. Water gun in the shower – while your hubby’s in the shower, sneak in quietly and squirt him with a water gun. He will probably pull you in there with him.

14. Car flirting – tease him a little when he’s driving (nothing dangerous though). Slide your hand on his thigh, take his hand and put it on your thigh, anything that the kids won’t notice will be fun.

15. Wear red – scientists have shown that guys are instinctively attracted to this color.

16.   Peep show at morning rush – in the middle on the morning rush, flash him full on. This unexpected flirt will make him feel like the luckiest man on the planet and keep his mind on you all day.

17. Pick your clothes – before a date night, step out of the shower in your towel and let him pick what you’ll wear – Skirt, shoes, top, panties, lipstick, perfume, everything.

His choices will probably surprise you. A great reminder that you don’t really know everything about each other.

18. Book club – pull out a copy of the Kama Sutra out of your bag and ask him if he is interested in joining your book club.

Conclusion

Flirting shouldn’t be retired once you’ve got the ring. It brings back the spark, the romance and excitement to your marriage and makes both of you feel wanted.

You can easily re-ignite the flame with an ongoing series of sparks like the 18 ideas mentioned above.

You’ll be surprised how these small and simple ideas can make such a huge difference.

Most importantly – have fun.

What about you? What’s your favorite way to flirt with your spouse? Come on, teach me something new 🙂

Rooting for ya,

Lisa

I’m sharing everything on my journey to affair recovery and a loving, stable marriage. Will you join me?

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PAID ENDORSEMENT DISCLOSURE: In order for me to support my blogging activities, I may receive monetary compensation or other types of remuneration for my endorsement, recommendation, testimonial and/or link to any products or services from this blog.

3 Powerful Ways to Use Texting to Spice up Your Marriage

 spice up your marriage

I can’t remember who said:

A successful marriage is falling in love many times with the same person.

While this is true, it’s a bit easier said than done.

Most Long term relationships naturally struggle in the romance and passion department.

However, it may sound weird but:

You can bring the romance and passion back to your marriage – simply by pushing a few buttons on your cell phone.

I’ve recently discovered that texting is the quickest and easiest way to spice up my marriage and bring passion back to our every day busy life.

In this post you’ll discover exactly how to use your cell phone to make him think about you all day (and love you all night…)

Is Passion Through Texting Possible?

When you’re married or in a relationship for a long time, you have to work to keep the passion alive. We all know that.

According to Michael Fiore:

“Pushing a few buttons on your cell phone can create a private little fantasy world between you and your spouse, where you can say or do anything without anyone else having a clue.”

I’ve had Michael Fiore’s “Text the Romance” guide for about 2 weeks and I have to admit that I haven’t gotten this much attention from my husband in a long time. It’s like we’re newlyweds again.

The texts I’ve been sending him have had a huge impact on him. I was blown away by all the romance just those few texts have caused.

And I really want to share some of this with you and show you how easy and effective it is to use texting to spice up your marriage.

How to Spice Up Your Marriage Through Texting

According to Mike (a well-known relationship coach and best-selling author, there are only three things you have to do to wake up the romance center of any man’s brain and turn him into the “romantic beast” you deserve:

  • Remind him what a valuable prize you are…and bait him into hunting and chasing you again.
  • Give him “permission” to be a guy.
  • Make him feel safe.

And yes, you can do all of that with the cell phone you’ve got in your pocket or purse right now.

There are plenty of text types you can send your spouse, but even “cheesy” texts, sent the right way, can send massive thrills through your man.

For example:

“You have no idea how much I love and appreciate you, but I’m going to show you tonight”.

Flirty Texting to Spice Things Up

According to “Text the Romance Back“, flirty texts are tiny little messages sent during the day, that “force” your spouse to start thinking about you and craving for you.

They create a hunger in him to see you and even get his inner motor running so he starts fantasizing about you and become a little obsessed with you.

Example:

(The Tease) If you were here right now…

(Super simple and gets any guy engaged)

Or:

When I see you tonight I’m going to…

Him: What?

You: “Oh, you’ll find out… 🙂

Or:

You can’t even imagine how it’s going to feel when I…

Simple, easy, sooo effective.

Dirty Texting to Spice Up Your Marriage

Apparently the key to “dirty” texting is to use the right words and the right language to engage your husband’s imagination and to make him feel like he had a highly charged “dirty” experience with you, even if he is miles away from you right now.

But this doesn’t involve going right for “vulgar” without build up or anticipation.

You have to use tension and anticipation to build up and tease him…and to use “power words” of “feel” and “imagine” to hijack the sexual center on his brain.

Here’s how you do it:

Step #1 – the “Curiosity Magnet”

This is a simple hook to get him to pay attention to you…now.

Step #2 – establish sexual context

Step #3 – take control and narrate your spouse’s experience for him.

Step #4 – use the “anticipation builder” to turn your dirty text into a self-fulfilling prophesy.

Here’s an example (from Text the Romance Back“):

You (out of nowhere): “I can’t stop thinking about…

Him: About what?

You: “Your ass when you stepped out of the shower this morning. It’s all I could do not to drag you back into bed with me”.

Him: “Oh really? J”

You: “Really. You have no idea how gorgeous you are…I wish I was there with you right now. Just imagine me walking into your office, this hunger all across my face…”

(At this point you continue to narrate the scene in the present tense to give a really nice ride, I don’t want to get explicit here, you get the idea).

Than you finish off with something simple like:

“Can’t wait to see you tonight…you have no idea how you turn me on. Try not to think about … (something he really likes sexually).

Remember, have fun with this, and the sky is the limit.

More Ideas for Texts

In my favorite new e-book I’ve found lots of different texts, here’s what I’ve learned (and use every day):

  • Sensual Compliments – how to add spark to your day, draw his attention to you and get his passion center working in overdrive.
  • Text Kisses (yup)
  • Appreciation Texts – making him feel wanted, desired and appreciated.
  • How to use “digital foreplay” and “private whispers” to stimulate his senses, get him thinking about you, getting him “in the mood” and crave you without resorting to uncomfortable or vulgar words and phrases.
  • How to use these texts in unique situations like long distance relationship and business trips.

Again, these things work like magic. It’s like we’re love struck teenagers, making out in the movies again.

I love just knowing that I’ve just put a big (sexy) smile on his face, each time I send him one of these flirty texts.

[yellowbox]You can find 3 more great examples on Mike Fiore’s website HERE. (You’ll see him talk on the Rachael Ray show and how one “magic” text gave Rachael tingles).[/yellowbox]

What do you think? Can you spice your marriage only by using your cell phone? Have you ever tried it? Tell me about it in the comments below.

Rooting for ya,

Lisa

I’m sharing everything on my journey to affair recovery and a loving, stable marriage. Will you join me?

* indicates required



PAID ENDORSEMENT DISCLOSURE: In order for me to support my blogging activities, I may receive monetary compensation or other types of remuneration for my endorsement, recommendation, testimonial and/or link to any products or services from this blog.